What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize