We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
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How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
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I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize