i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
