Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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