I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
