"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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