why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize
