I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Randomize