Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?