Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Did you hit it?

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Did you hit it? (616): Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes. http://tfl.nu/3ocm
  Replies (10) Good night (1173) Bad night (2224)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face. http://tfl.nu/tz6f
  Replies (7) Good night (2740) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water. http://tfl.nu/oebe
  Replies (29) Good night (1583) Bad night (7106)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty. http://tfl.nu/9wi8
  Replies (100) Good night (12521) Bad night (2112)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days...... http://tfl.nu/e1u4
  Replies (10) Good night (3590) Bad night (1748)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED. http://tfl.nu/xnx5
  Replies (8) Good night (3187) Bad night (1664)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve? http://tfl.nu/wzep
  Replies (3) Good night (1117) Bad night (2886)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons. http://tfl.nu/qh0d
  Replies (8) Good night (957) Bad night (2601)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra. http://tfl.nu/riuo
  Replies (4) Good night (2315) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles http://tfl.nu/5ilu
  Replies (12) Good night (1057) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again. http://tfl.nu/4a7s
  Replies (7) Good night (492) Bad night (1441)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel http://tfl.nu/1v3g
  Replies (15) Good night (1379) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty" http://tfl.nu/jvva
  Replies (1) Good night (1477) Bad night (477)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it http://tfl.nu/wpx7
  Replies (1) Good night (802) Bad night (265)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else http://tfl.nu/bz1h
  Replies (1) Good night (490) Bad night (287)

Randomize