It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
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This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
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Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Life without a bra equals bliss.