Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
