Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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