...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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