p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
We don't watch enough power rangers
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
How many fucks given?
0.12846
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
