We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
