I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
