Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
