What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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