I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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