i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
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