I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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