the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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