please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize