I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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