5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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