chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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