Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
