i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
