I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize