The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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