He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
