If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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