gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
