Who wears a wallet chain?!
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
How's work?
Spinning.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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