Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like iHOP with fire
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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