This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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