I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
