She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
