Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize