Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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