it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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