what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
