Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I'm both gender and math confused
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
