Plan B is the new Plan A
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
