Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I licked your asshole in confidence.
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