Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
