he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
