can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
