I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
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If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
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How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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