I'm lost and stupid without you.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
