We won't sleep together?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
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