i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
