so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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